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None of this is ours; we wrote nothing; we are human and therefore make mistakes, so please email us before the wank begins–we’re happy to fix our mistakes!; posting is every day that ends in a 0 or 5.

Chasing Thursdays

Elsa has no desire to follow in her politician mother’s footsteps and Emma wants to quit working at Granny’s. They decide to open Frozen and take advantage of the summer tourist season, but Emma doesn’t count on their neighbor, tattoo

The Night King

After V-Day, Merlin fixes the hole in Harry’s head with his magic and then makes Harry the new Arthur — a job which comes with the responsibility of leading the Wild Hunt every full moon. Eggsy makes a discovery of

Arts and Crafts

Chuck Hansen is home after graduating from college, searching for a job – and, as part of the arrangement, gets stuck dropping his four year-old sister Lucy off at preschool every morning. He stops bitching once he meets Mr. Becket.

A More Lethal Dress

During a rewatch a few weeks ago, Fire_Sign made the remark that the black dress Phryne wears to dinner with Lin… (you know, the dinner where she offends Lin by implying that he knows anything about the opium trade which,

The Bigger the Dream, the Harder the Grind

“There’s an app for this you know,” Merlin said. “It’s called Grindr. It’s highly popular amongst men who are gay or bi-curious-” “I know what it is,” Harry replied testily, eager to nip the conversation in the bud before it

Where My Demons Hide

When Yancy Becket died still connected to Raleigh in the Drift, Raleigh lost everything, including part of his soul. Unable to deal with the reminders and accusations that he’d killed his Alpha Guardian brother Raleigh fled the Anchorage Shatterdome. Five

Series || Yours, Mine, & Ours ‘verse

Featuring: Giant sharks, family bonding, a bazooka, frustration, idiot fathers, purple casts, mothers that just don’t understand, New Years confetti, and Grace facepalming way more often than she would like it. Rated T for “Throw them in a closet until

The Devil’s White Knight

When Harry wakes up in an alternate timeline–a timeline where Voldemort was defeated long before the first war–he discovers everything is different. His parents, his godfather, his friends–and him. Harry must deal with the consequences of who he would have

Series || Loud and Clear

The thing with Roy is founded on coffee snobbery and stupid text messages and seriously awesome makeout sessions in the car. Oh, and the love of a lifetime, or whatever.

Getting It Right

Five times Eggsy gets Harry to kiss him for the wrong reasons (and one time he gets it right).

Series || The Adventures of Autistic Spidey and Schizophrenic Wade (Who Fall in Love and Do Other Fun Stuff)

Spider-Man meets Deadpool for the first time, and realizes there’s more to the merc than people have been telling him when he spirals unexpectedly into a panic attack and Deadpool actually stays with him through it. Not only stays, but

Series || Yancy’s Badonkadick

Yancy’s hung like a horse; Raleigh plans to take him for a ride.

No One Likes Us (We Don’t Care)

When Harry Hart turned up at the police station to pick Eggsy up, he thought his luck had changed – after years of Dean, this posh new alpha was offering to take Eggsy away from the estate where he’d been

It Ain’t Moonlight, But It’ll Do

Healing after closing the Breach doesn’t mean no one has nightmares anymore. Sometimes, they’re bad enough to make another attempt at sleep an awful idea. On those occasions, a former jaeger pilot might take a certain amount of comfort from

2 + 2 = More

Shawn and Lassiter are shocked when versions of themselves from a parallel universe come through the mirrors and are stuck in their world until they can figure out who or what caused the phenomenon and how to reverse it. More

Series || Four Hearts Are Better Than One

It’s the end of the day, and they’re on freaking vacation, so Yancy decides he wants to relax in their in-suite jacuzzi bathtub. His boyfriends have other ideas.

Life, Love, Empire, and Cake

Peter Quill’s mom had (as far as he remembered) always been a sweet, gentle and kindly soul. As such, he had grown up convinced that his father must have been, by way of cosmic balance, an asshole, and 100% a

As Fate Would Have It

Eggsy never joined Kingsman. Instead, he finished his Marines training and was recruited by MI6. Harry and Eggsy meet for the first time in over seventeen years at Imperial College.

The Backup Plan

Roxy is the backup plan. But even the best of backup plans are useless if the original works just fine.

Series || Best Laid Plans

“Dude,” said Holster, his eyes huge, “that’s so sad. We gotta get them together.” “This isn’t a romcom, Holtzy, ” Ransom said, patting his arm. “I’m sure that’s not what Shitty had in mind.” “Actually,” said Shitty, “that’s exactly what

Tea and No Sympathy

It’s Potter’s fault, of course, that Draco finds himself trapped in the same twenty-four-hour period, repeating itself over and over again. It’s been nearly a year since the unpleasant business at Hogwarts, and Draco’s getting on with his life quite

Throw Rocks Kiss Hard

What the hell. The brat /likes/ him. And has been treating Raleigh pretty much like an eight-year-old treats the classmate they have a super secret crush on. Flinging insults and rocks their way and hope they never notice, or something.

The Gentleman’s Guide to Heat

Eggsy isn’t surprised by the fact that the Kingsman appear to be nearly all alphas. Eggsy is an omega, then he’s a Kingsman, and no two heats are alike.

Sweet, Sweet Love

“Sweet, sweet love,” Jamie repeats, because really there’s no option here but to own it. He raises an eyebrow. “You in?” He leans closer. “Dare you.” “Oh,” Tyler says, sitting up straight. “It is on.”

You Cannot Live As I Have Lived (and not end up like this)

It’s not that no one knows about werewolves and other things that go bump in the night, but the giant Lovecraftian monsters rising out of the sea seemed slightly more important at the time. The life and times of Raleigh

Stuck in Reverse

They were polar opposites from different worlds. They worked smoothly together on missions, but there was something else between them. It was always there, pushing and pulling, tearing into them. Napoleon has no idea what to make of this Sentinel

Series || The Kaiju Underground

Long story short, Raleigh takes Chuck hostage with a candybar, and then a gritty (slashy) reboot of the movie kind of happens. This is what might have happened if the boys had met without knowing who the other was first.

Button Up Your Overcoat

Ed could untie knots in the fifth and sixth dimensions — blindfolded. He could convince the military he fell through a rabbit-hole, and he could even shut down a Drachman invasion (with a little help), but he can’t seem to

Series || Psych Out

Lassiter is alarmed at finding himself attracted to Spencer following the Drimmer incident. He visits a friend in San Francisco, looking for advice, but Spencer has tailed him. Lust overtakes them in the gayest city in the world, but can