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None of this is ours; we wrote nothing; we are human and therefore make mistakes, so please email us before the wank begins–we’re happy to fix our mistakes!; posting is every day that ends in a 0 or 5.

Touch-a Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me

Herc is desperate. He can understand Chuck not wanting anything to do with him, but the kid has deliberately shoved away everyone who might have gotten close to him and is determinedly alone in the world. So, he decides to

Married to the Job

“Hm?” Merlin asks, distracted when he looks up and squints at Eggsy’s face, then catches up and resumes working. “Oh. No. Zania Bonatti, Italian artist and activist. Also Harry’s wife.” “You wot?” Eggsy blurts, eyes snapping back to him, then

Unusual Weather

Bucky’s been at the Avengers Tower for three weeks before he finally gives in to Steve’s gentle coaxing and Stark’s cheerful waving of fistfuls of circuits, and lets them scan the arm. It doesn’t go well.

Our Lives Are Not a Linear Path

At 25 years old, Yancy Becket dies reaching out, leaving behind a younger brother with his soul torn in half, and an unborn child who will never know his father. At 22 years old, Raleigh Becket finds himself newly discharged

How Not to Attack Harry Hart

Everybody wants to hurt Harry Hart. Harry’s really not sure what he’s done to garner such attention. Where attacking even an amnesiac Harry proves near impossible. This is a romantic comedy with a dose of violence.

Saving the World (Is Totally a Date)

Tony discovers Stane’s betrayal while he’s still being held captive. When he escapes, he sets out to ruin Stane as completely and ruthlessly as he can, playing up his PTSD and quitting his job to destroy Stane quietly from the

Series || A cats and dogs love song

Chuck knows what he’s about – he’s interning at one of the most prestigious architecture firms in Chicago (the fact that its his step-dad’s firm is immaterial) and he doesn’t have time for drama or bullshit. Which does not explain

Til Kingdom Come

After saving an illegally enslaved apostate mage from an Orlesian noble, The Iron Bull finds himself with a new member of the Chargers. Dorian, his magic and his voice bound, is a beautiful and enigmatic addition to his team, and

Creative Uses of Technology for the Modern Gentleman

Eggsy’s mouth pulls into a little smirk, because of course he’s eager to show off – but he doesn’t move, just waits for Harry to tell him what to do. Harry’s buzzing with the desire to make Eggsy take off

Fair Share

Parker doesn’t have manners; she has mannerisms, some of them disturbing, some of them endearing, most of them strange.

En Avant

“My name’s Eggsy—I mean, Guinevere Unwin,” she says. “I’m—I’m in Holborn Police Station and—my mum said to call—“

Pound the Alarm

The Iron Bull is a firefighter with scars and history to spare. Dorian keeps setting things on fire- like curtains, and dates. Or, the one where two messed up people find each other, Solas is a not-exactly righteous avenger, Cullen

The Sword Master

After his sister’s wedding, Raleigh stays on in the Kingdom of Sydney and deals with his battle fatigue in all the wrong ways.

Series || Aftermath

Another escape pod is found near the Breach, shortly after Raleigh and Mako are located, and Chuck is alive, but in critical condition and suffering from radiation poisoning. His indeterminate status makes celebration difficult. Each person attempts to do their

Sweet Disorder

“Maybe you should get over here and fuck me,” Eggsy said, sprawled on his belly on the living room sofa, watching Coronation Street and going spare with boredom. “Maybe you should get over here and take what you want,” Harry

Power of Two

In which Dorian and Bull pick each other up at a club, Dorian’s family disapproves, and Max and Krem think this is all a terrible idea right up until they don’t. Dorian’s father dies, Dorian’s mother is cold, and Bull

Stormfronts

How far would you go to get to someone you loved? A storm descends on DC and one man will risk it all. In this story, the rescue is only the beginning. Tibbs Slash with a heavy dose of cliffies

Lagavulin and Guinness

Plenty of people had looked down on Eggsy throughout his life. He had gotten fairly used to it. Didn’t mean it was fair, but he knew how these things worked. What really sucked was that the new Arthur was worse

Series || In Heat

You’re in heat,” Clint blurts out as he steps into Phil’s office late on a Friday afternoon, the realization so stark and undeniable that the words are out of his mouth before he has finished thinking them.

Series || On Life’s Weary Seas

Herc gets tired of waiting for Raleigh and Chuck to make up after their fight. So, like any good father and friend, he forces the issue.

Something Fierce and Painful

“You know, most couples would take a minimum of eighteen months to produce two children.” Bull grins. “It is way, way too late for us to be like most couples.”

Uluru Steak

Yancy takes the Hansens’ offer to visit his new head chef in Las Vegas. Raleigh comes along. (Jaz doesn’t)

Gipsy Cafe

After his mom’s death, Yancy’s struggling to keep her cafe open and his family afloat. But when Jaz lands them a spot on Restaurant Rescue, the Hansens’ extremely popular reality show, his life gets a hell of a lot more

Flex to Fit

After that, Harry couldn’t stop thinking about how he could take all of Liam, how he could prep himself and train his body to relax and flex around Liam’s enormous cock, letting every inch sink inside. He figured the best

Patience and Sheer Determination

Harry goes undercover to infiltrate the circle of a corrupt overlord and is given Eggsy, a young prostitute, as a token of goodwill. Harry has to live with Eggsy and keep him safe, while maintaining his cover.

Series || Fem!Eggsy and Harry Collection

Harry was never dead, to begin with. And Eggsy is having difficulty with this fact. Harry is the new Arthur and fem!Eggsy is the new Bedivere (because we could always use more always-a-girl!Eggsy). Together they attempt to understand one another

Series || Chuck was injured instead of Herc

They say you never really know a guy till you break his face with your fist. Okay, they don’t really say that, but fuck it all, they should.

Lines We Cross

Nineteen year old Bane is well on his way to becoming Gotham’s latest menace when he is injured during a fight and helped by a police officer, one who strangely enough doesn’t seem frightened of him or his mask. Intrigued

As the Sun Burns the Ground

Five times Iron Bull had to carry Dorian and one time Dorian tried to carry Bull, gave up, and levitated him instead.

Antigravity

Five times Spock was surprised by the brilliance of Kirk’s mind, and one time he totally saw it coming.