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When Pete Wentz decides to write a soap opera, he doesn’t do it small; he does it HUGE and gets everyone involved. But is the real soap opera the one playing out for the television audience with Spanish villas and pirates and evil, sinister betrothals or the one behind the scenes that involves pill poppers, awesome partiers, live chickens, romantic gay love, wacky Three’s Company Too mix ups and betrayal of the worst and most heinous kind? Well, that’s kind of up to the crazy mix of actors, musicians, various crew and production members to decide for themselves. Even if they are the ones in the thick of it.
Pete, in Decaydance Mansion, with a yarrow stake. Frank and Gerard, in the greenhouse, with a plant of questionable origin. Bob, everywhere you look, with a gang of assassins for justice. Vampires, valets, pamphlets, haunted furniture, dub-thrall, disembodied voices, zombie couriers, and sinister rituals.
Hospital AU. Spencer Smith has moved to Chicago to work at Chicago General with his best friend, one Ryan Ross. Here he meets some hilarious staff members, makes a lot of friends, and drinks a lot of coffee.
Brendon and Spencer go on a cruise to escape their problems. They end up finding more than rest and relaxation.*
“Hotel night!” Brendon chirps, inserting herself into the middle of the cluster of people and bags in the lobby. “I call Spencer!”*
Bob and Spencer’s band mates are conniving little shits, and they get a look at what constitutes romantic while on tour.
Andie woke up to the sunlight shining right in her eyes. That was so fucking wrong. Her room didn’t even face east, so what the…*
A drycleaners, a hair salon, the park bench that brings them together, and their various friends and enemies; one summer at the mall.*
When it comes to Brendon, though, all the normal guy-like ‘way to go man’ platitudes fail him. With Brendon, all Spencer can be is seethingly fucking jealous.*
He wishes he could pinpoint when it had happened, when he’d stopped watching Ryan’s mouth and started watching Spencer’s hands.*
When one is the male princess of a magical kingdom, few things come as a surprise anymore. Princess Gerard Way of the kingdom of Belleville sets out on a quest to fulfill a prophecy and encounters dragons, climbs mountains, runs from volcanoes, banters with King Peter of Wilmette, and finds true love along the way.*
The first year they’d been together, Bob had called Spencer on Easter and said, “Happy Easter?” because he wasn’t really clear on exactly what Spencer’s brand of Christianity was. It didn’t seem to involve as much bitterness as Ryan’s, nor as much angst as Brendon’s, but it wasn’t exactly as lackadaisical as Jon’s, either, from what Bob could tell.*
“Yeah,” Pete continues, rolling his eyes before pinning his glare back on her, “the reputation we’d have for letting out barely-legal singer get her shit touched on stage while the three guys in the band sat back and watched. Real nice. Sign me up for that rep.”
I saw a picture of Patrick and said, “Patrick teaches tenth grade science.” The rest wrote itself! Yes, the first section ends abruptly, but really, we were distracted by Gerard.*
Spencer hangs out with Billie and Gerry. They go to girls’ school! They are bitches! It’s a very cool girls’ school, so there’s no uniforms and some classes are outdoors and they go on field trips to Mexico.
Gerard recognizes him, and that’s not weird, but a little bit, because he was pretty sure the only boyband member he would recognize on sight was Timberlake and only then because of the whole “wardrobe malfuction” thing and whoa did that kid ever not pay his publicist enough.* In the same universe as 42.
“Bob, you’re the man for me. No one has ever made me happier, dude, seriously. Fuck Mikey, okay? I can do anything he can do, and better.” Follows the Future In Your Pictures.
Pete Wentz is the star of the soccer team. He’s their team’s only saving grace, and they’re damn lucky they even have him — word is, he’s on a Division One club team that’s ranked second in the nation. The only information disputing this is that he’s maybe on the number one team. He’s gone enough that it’s believable, but then, he goes out with enough girls (and boys, though that’s less going out and more just making out) that it stops making sense.*
Brendon loves touring. He loves touring and he loves their bus and he loves his band and he loves The Academy and he loves the UK and he loves Jaggermeister.*
It’s the high seas at an indeterminate point in history. Gruesome Gerard and Lyn-z face off in a contest of who will be the dominant do-gooder, with Ray the cook, Mikey the first mate, Pete the stowaway, Frank the failed ninja, and assorted others falling over in the background. In short: pirate AU!*
In which Jon and Spencer work for a film company and are shooting a documentary on the Skylines and Turnstiles tour, feat. My Chemical Romance, Panic at the Disco, Fall Out Boy, The Academy Is…*
Brian is not entirely sure how he ended up with a half-naked Brendon Urie in his lap, just like he is unsure of how My Chem ended up on tour with Panic at the Disco in the first place.*
Frank the lonely barista and Gerard the loyal consumer/art student. Guest appearances by Patrick the shift supervisor and Brendon the romantic.*
Pete sometimes wanted to form an “only-boy-in-the-band” club. He could ask Ryan to join.*
Immediately following the events of “Patrick’s Garden Center.” He had just propositioned some random guy right there at the farmer’s market!* Sequel to Patrick’s Garden Center.
“This is political,” Gerard announces, and kisses him.*
“I just don’t wanna go alone,” Frankie has said, and tugged on Bob’s arm until he agreed to accompany Frank to the piercing studio.*
“What? Oh, geez, kid.” Gerard laughs, and it’s not mean, but the kid half-flinches back, a repressed sort of reaction, mostly suppressed but still visible. Gerard notices for the first time the way the line of his hips is sharp enough to cut paper. “Ryan,” he says, meeting Gerard’s eyes again. “My name is Ryan.”*
Pete probably shouldn’t have told the world that Patrick Stump had no game, and he definitely shouldn’t have told Panic at the Disco. Because Patrick Stump is an evil mastermind, and he knows exactly how to make Pete admit the error of his ways.*
Gerard Way, a Cartoon Network peon in possession of the world’s worst taste in men, may have finally found the perfect boyfriend. Or a serial killer.* Based on the movie Head Over Heels.
Frank takes a quick look in his rear view mirror, runs his fingers through his messy hair and then smiles at his reflection as he slides the key out of the ignition. He’s really fucking late, but that’s never a good reason to look anything less than hot. He grabs his cargo bag out of the passenger seat and flips the automatic lock on his second hand Honda and then walks as quickly as his short legs will carry him to the entrance of Penny Lane.* Retelling of Never Been Kissed.
Frank was sitting on the floor in Gerard’s basement room, waiting for Gerard to come shuffling down the basement steps with his holey, army green bag and messy hair. After Gerard had gone off to art school, Gerard’s parents had refurbished the basement so that Gerard had a place to stay when he was at home that did not share a bathroom with his brother.* Sequel to The Holly Golightly Club.
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