The thing is, if they’d wanted him to actually pay attention to the interview, they shouldn’t have sat him next to the lady with the polar bear cub.*
“Let me get this straight,” Nick says, ignoring Joe’s snickers. “You accidentally implied that Mike Carden is a rapist.”*
“I got married to Mike Carden,” Kevin says. “I asked you, like four times, if you were sure,” Nick says.*
“Um.” Kevin twists his fingers together and tries to think of a non-pathetic way to beg Carden not to kill and eat him. He’d totally be gamey and, like, like—juicy and tender, *oh sweet baby Jesus*, who the heck is he kidding? Kevin would be *delicious*, he’s all solid and active and healthy and stuff, it’s like his mom’s been feeding him up for years and years for this exact moment. Have another apple, son, someday a scary-intense, super hot guy is going to *eat you alive*.*
When Carden shoplifts from the Jonas Family corner store, he has to work it off as punishment. With bonus charming-slash-harrassing Beckett.*
Kevin’s confession loses him one family, gains him one; he still manages to come out ahead, somehow.*
FBR’s Hot Messes versus the Jonas Brothers’ Road Dogs in an epic battle of the softball titans.*
It turns out coming to terms with a shift in sexual orientation isn’t any easier the second time around.*
Where Kevin is only half a son, Nick has got Miley pregnant, Joe has chosen the wrong Taylor and Frankie is two years shy of a teenage rebellion that will put everyone else’s to shame.*
When Pete Wentz throws a Halloween party, he doesn’t just set out some pumpkins and peeled grapes. After due consideration and some time with the other guests (for values of ‘other guests’ that mean ‘Mike Carden’), Kevin is glad.*
In which Kevin is a sad little elf, and Mike panics and buys way the fuck too much tinsel.*
Mike is an angry 17 year old who’s been exiled from home for the summer while his parents finalize their divorce. Shipped off to William’s place, he’s startled to find that William has somehow found himself a shifty older boy friend, and an angel in the attic.*
Kevin quits showbiz, gets a divorce, goes to college, starts a band, and gets adopted by crazy people.*
“We’ll get it, and it’ll be cute for a day, and then I’ll be the one stuck feeding it and cleaning up after it,” Kevin says, trying to aim for his mom’s scary face and probably falling flat, because Mike just crowds into his space and smiles slow.
“Isn’t that exactly the same thing you said when I mentioned wanting kids?” he asks.*
Every Saturday night, every teenager in town tuned into Radio Freedom. Mike’s their biggest fan, and that was before he met their star DJ. Otherwise known as the pirate-radio AU.*
After the Jonas Brothers stopped being the Jonas Brothers and went back to being the plan old Jonas brothers, Joe went to LA to work in movies, Nick went to New York to work on music, and Frankie rebelled and ran off to Chicago. Kevin, though. Kevin just got divorced.*
Kevin has a big, fat crush and a guitar class with Mike. Did I mention Kevin shares a dorm room with one Adam T. Siska… or that Mike happens to live with Bill who basically runs campus? Meanwhile the band is planning a huge surprise for the President’s annual Winter Soiree.*
Kevin Jonas, resident Maid Marian, is the eldest son of an infamous crime lord, and he is quiet, polite, shy, and very obedient. At least, until his sprawling suburban home is burglarized by Mike Carden, resident Robin Hood (sort of).*
The week that all of Kevin’s friends leave to go to college, he turns off the phone and plays eight different games of Monopoly with Nick.*
Mike doesn’t really know how these things happen to him. No, wait, he does. He can totally blame it on Bill. / Kevin doesn’t really know how these things happen to him. It’s possible he was a disobedient lemur in a past life and this is how the universe is letting him make amends. Or maybe there’s like, some kind of quota for number of crazy things a person has to do in his life, and fate’s just helping him along. But probably, probably it’s just Joe’s fault.*
It all starts –
No, really it starts when Mike picks up the phone after TAI’s set, when they’re back on the bus and heading for — fuck, he doesn’t know, somewhere else they’re supposed to be. Or maybe it started the first time he picked up the phone and said hey, since that’s what made the rest of it possible. But this time, he picks up the phone and he dials, and there’s no answer.*
Marengo Tower was the Tower for wayward Talents, those who had been sent to the edge of the galaxy to rot. It was a punishment duty, though of course no-one ever called it that. So how on Earth or off it did they get assigned a Prime? And a member of the legendary Jonas family at that? What could he have done to merit Marengo? (An extension/AU of the Tower & Hive series of books by Anne McCaffery.)*
In which Kevin Jonas gets lost twice and is found each time, and Mike Carden is almost (but really not) a fourteen-year-old girl. Or, a story about getting lost and finding more than just your way.*
Four Times Mike Carden and Kevin Jonas Didn’t Have Sex (And One Time They Did, And It Was Totally Worth The Wait)
Mike Carden/Kevin Jonas (yes, THAT Kevin Jonas)*
“It’s more or less forgotten until the VMAs- when Bill- fucking Bill- appears at Mike’s elbow and goes, “Michael, I’ve mentioned Demi to you before, haven’t I? Oh, and this is her bosom companion, Miss Katherine Jonas.”*
When Kevin Jonas and his brothers on the Lovebug encounter a mechanical problem, they aren’t expecting an injured stowaway to be responsible. The last few years have been tough on Card, and he wasn’t expecting to find anyone who’d take a chance for a scarred nobody who won’t even tell them his real name. Escaping was only one step, though, and Card can’t keep running forever. Eventually he’s going to have to stop and face his issues and his past. He can only hope he’ll have someone to stand with him.*
Kevin walked down the corridor with his nose in his English notes, trying desperately to sort out his Cordelia’s from his Ophelia’s before the test in first period English. He ducked Macy’s wildly swung hockey stick, stepped around Joe and Stella’s awkward conversation, and opened his locker with an expert tap of his fist.*
Kevin Lucas is not a girl, even if he did just wake up as one. He’s handling it pretty well though; especially once he gets some highly unexpected help from Mike Carden, William Beckett, and Brendon Urie, who isn’t a girl either. But with his parents worried, his brothers suspicious, and Spencer Smith apparently plotting his demise, waking up as a girl might actually be the least of Kevin’s problems. [JONAS-verse]*
Mike Carden is a student without a scholarship who needs to find a way to fund his studies, fast. When William suggests Mike try out for the coed cheerleading squad, the Northeastern University Cobras, Mike mans up and lands his first sober back tuck in years. Kevin Jonas and Nic Anderson are two star college cheerleaders who have transferred to the Cobras after a mysterious scandal had them leaving their last school right before the National competition they were a shoo-in to win. Mike may have only scraped his way onto the team by the skin of his teeth, but with Kevin as his room mate, maybe he can master the stag tuck, the pom-pom wielding, and the insults from every other athlete department on campus. And maybe Kevin can learn how to be a real boy (who likes boys) beyond the limits of the life he left behind. [college cheerleading AU]*