Like a Classic

So: due to a series of complicated and improbable events involving some sort of life debt and signed promise from two generations ago, it was decreed that Patrick had to marry the Crown Prince of Canada.

Obvious From the Start

It’s not like Patrick even likes radio, because he hasn’t really listened to anything that’s not on his iPod or his Pandora stations in years, but when he notices the red and white flyer advertising the student radio station on


Jonny’s prostate is a gift from the gods. Patrick’s patience, also.

God, He’s Gorgeous

“Jesus Christ, keep it in your pants Peeks.” Sharpy has covered his mic and is clearly trying not to laugh at him. Patrick doesn’t care enough to tell him to fuck off. “God, he’s gorgeous,” Patrick says to Sharpy, looking

(Coffee’s For Closers)

Tyler Seguin and Patrick Kane are roommates, but Jonny kind of is as well since he never seems to leave. Jamie’s just a barista who has to put up with Tyler’s shit.

You Make It Look Good

Nylon calls him on Tuesday for a thing on the weekend, and he says sure, if Sunday’s okay. They do weirder, more avant-garde shit than he’s ever really up for on an intellectual level, but on an intellectual level modeling

I’m Bound to Walk Away These Blues

Pat closes his eyes, rubs at his eyelids with the back of his hand, and tries opening them again. No luck. The Mountie is still there.

Changing On the Fly

“Where’s Kaner?” Jonny asks. “Where did this pit bull come from?” Duncs chews on his lip. “Uh, see, there’s actually only one answer to both those questions.” Still muzzy with sleep, Jonny blinks at the guys. “So, like – Kaner

Orbital Resonance

Patrick Kane and Jonathan Toews should probably have figured out the first time what this type of behavior meant.


The internet is a dangerous place, or: Patrick and Jonny meet, lie through their teeth, and fall in love. Mostly that last part.

(get on your knees) you’ve got something to prove

“I’m actually pretty good at sex though,” Patrick says as a non sequitur, picking back up on the conversation from earlier.

Weather’d Every Rack

The Hawks retire Jonny’s jersey at the home opener of the 2016 season, against the Jets. The Madhouse is completely, uncharacteristically silent as number 19 rises, the bold white C catching on the arena lights. Pat watches as stoically as

Cello Suite no. 1

The first time Jonathan meets Patrick Kane is because he hits him with a lacrosse ball. In Jonathan’s defense, he threw a perfect pass to Seabs, who failed to just reach the one or two feet above his head to

So I Let My Walls Come Down, Down

In which Jonathan Toews doesn’t play hockey, but still has great hands, and Patrick Kane is wooed through food he can’t pronounce. AU with chef!Tazer.

I’m Ready to Give This All I Have (I’m Ready to Be Amazed)

Five times Patrick and Jonny played house, and one time they finally got their shit together. Or: Patrick proposes in pre-school. It just takes them a while to figure themselves out.

Series || Nightverse

Blackhawks: Jonny Toews destroys his Bond with Patrick Kane after Brent Seabrook is injured in a fight with the St. Louis vampires. Patrick turns to Duncan Keith (Seabs’s mate) for comfort, then runs away when Duncan admits sleeping together was

Series || Still Waters

“Why did we stop doing this?” Pat asks, dick softening against Jon’s hip. “We wanted different things,” Jon says, curling his arm around Pat. “Did we?” Pat asks, sounding doubtful. “Yeah,” explains Jon. “I wanted a relationship, you wanted to

voyons donc, je veux votre confiance, à quoi qu’il arrive

The scientists like to think that the differing dynamics evolved some time in the far past, at some point when the human population was at risk and the development of various dynamics assured the continued existence of humans. No one

Dynamical Systems

“So I saw you at practice,” Jonny says next time they meet up. Kaner nods. “All in the name of math, Jonny,” he says. “Statistics in particular.”

Cup Champs

In January, they all spent a lot of time trying not to talk about hockey and in turn started talking about the only other thing they all had relative knowledge of: music (in hindsight Kaner’s pretty fucking happy Duncs’ Xbox

Three Hundred Sandwiches

“Want a sandwich?” he asks, cutting Tazer off as he starts to build up into an impressive rant about the businessman he got stuck next to. Tazer nods, settling down at the island and flipping through Patrick’s mail, even though

I Got a Love (That Keeps Me Waiting)

There’s a lot of different ways this summary could go, like: Patrick Kane gets more than a gold medal in Sochi. Or, the classic: It’s too late to pull out now. Or: Patrick Kane continues to thrive in high pressure

All Your Favorite Foods

Jonny sent Pat a picture of him fishing. Naturally, things escalated from there.

In My Blood and In My Bones

Patrick’s not really into dudes—he’s done that whole thing a couple of times—that’s rock-n-roll after all, but god. when Jonathan smiles, he looks really good. Jonny is a nanny. Patrick’s a musician. They fall in love. Inspired by the movie

Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien

So, Kaner has a beard. That’s new. And strange. Because Kaner has proven for years that the beard is just beyond him, which is why he has the playoff mullet rather than the playoff beard, so when Jonny sees him

Sign It With Your Heart

Patrick loses a bet and is dared to plant an anonymous love letter into a random locker. It just so happens that the locker belongs to one Jonathan Toews, captain of the school hockey team. Meanwhile, Jonny finds himself in

A Very Kaner Christmas

Patrick blurts, “I need you to be my Christmas boyfriend.” “No,” Jonny says. He sounds confused, but in Patrick’s defense, it was a pretty straightforward request. Like, there’s only so much a guy can do. (A lighthearted Christmas fic featuring